the Truth

Little girl, so innocent and naive...

Her body hijacked for years,

Murdered by a man before she ever fully existed...

Silent for years, her voice cast away as a distant memory...

...with each encounter her worth became void, her value morphed into an ever-rising price.

a young girl...10-11-12-13-14-15... ...she spent years fighting her way free from a man who was supposed to be frail, highly esteemed, honored, and trustworthy...

Everybody loved him...family, work, church, community...

No body knew his secret acts, his overpowering control, his evil eyes when she told him no...

No one else heard the threats of harm, or felt the fears the darkness brought every night...

She learned to hide the encounters, cover the evidence, and how to be silent...

While he hunted for his opportunities, she crumbled inside...

Attempts to be undesirable failed...hair cuts, masculine, weight gain... no matter what, she remained his grade A choice steak...taken raw with no sides or sauce every chance he had.

She hid herself away in the darkness... Grasping for protection and safety, but even full bottles of pain killers wouldn’t remove her from the prison he held her in...no matter all the times she tried...

in the end, light reveals the darkness...

Truth shined bright even though every adult tried to dim it, mute it, and even deny it...

...vindicated when trial was suggested and encouraged, “We would win. You’d get a decent sum...”

...she couldn’t live off of “whore money”...always feeling like she was fucked with each transaction...no charges were filed at her choice, her insistence....

...family, hungry for details they never got created lies to destroy her: ...she dressed for it...she threw herself at him...she wanted his money...even he defended his actions “anything we did, she wanted and liked every minute”....this was his final statement to the police...

...there’s no deeper rejection than from blood and no greater pain to feel when the very people meant to protect you, discard you away as though you were dead instead.

Volcanic anger destroyed her trust, her heart, her life, and any person she intersected with for years. Until one day, she woke up and decided there had to be something more...

Done hiding for protection, only to destroy herself more....

...he had taken enough from her....stolen her life, made her an orphan, destroyed her mind, robbed her power, and muted her voice...

Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes of the life before...

She rose again...fighting back like she would every time he’d try to get on top of her...

...she started uncovering the lies she believed with every action...

Her body didn’t betray her.

She didn’t ask for it.

There wasn’t a cosmic flaw within her to cause him to switch from a loving family member into a monster.

She didn’t deserve to be blamed.

She should have been believed and protected, but instead was tossed aside while he was elevated.

The truth cost her family...but healing reimbursed her with a tribe that always has her back.
The pain, hurt, and rejection fed...HOPE...HEALING...RESILIENCY. The volcano of anger went dormant...and in its place being calm and level has won out.
After decades of words shredding her value and worth...she made a vow...her words would never destroy...her words would never shred...her words would never bruise...

Setting out to break the cycle she was born into, separated from the two used to create her very existence....

....she rose high above the hell she was living in....morphing...transforming into who she was meant to be all along...She took back her power that was buried with him in his grave...

And now she stands...fully alive.

Little girl never more...

She is an empowered woman with a strength that is relentless.



Emma Leigh

4/2021

my experience of child abuse and overcoming it in adulthood.

shared in honor of child abuse awareness month